Notes from a 33 year old.

Many people that I was close to when I was 24 realized how hard that birthday was for me. Here's the deal, I had set a personal goal to myself, I wanted to be married, settled into my career of choice and starting to build my family. However, when I turned 24 I wasn't anywhere I wanted to be. I was freshly out of college, in a career that was lack luster. I was single and living with my cat (shoutout to TonyDanza). Flash forward 9 years, almost a whole decade later. I find myself in the spot I've been waiting for.

I sat and rocked my baby to sleep tonight, with a belly of salmon that my husband smoked and boston cream pie that my mother brought over and I was happy. I may have been running on a little sleep and my head may still be spinning from the conference last week on wrap up details but I felt happy and content.

I thought 24 was my magic number, but I look at my sister who is 24 and think, how could I have possibly been "settled" at that age. I had memories and mistakes to make. I had places to see. I had food to eat. I had boys to date. I had relationships to make. I had houses to buy and moves to make. 24 was really the beginning of my adulthood. 

I refocused myself at 27 decided that that age was going to be my magic number. I said, "Wait a minute, I'm not about the traditional and I've never done things by the book, why was I trying to?" So I refocused what I wanted and started jumping at opportunities. I found myself in Guatemala, at St. Patty's day festivals, on personal trips to see family across state lines, and found the adult I wanted to become. 

Now at 33 I'm wondering if maybe this is my magic number. I've had to cool my jets on some of the things I want to do, but don't think I'm not plotting and planning my next adventure, not thinking of the next fish dish I can get Matt to make for me, or pinning a wonderful pinecone craft project that I can make for my home. 

Adulting isn't easy and Mommying is hard but staying true to your identity and setting realistic expectations may be the challenge I face on a daily basis. To my future self - remember the things that you want to do, don't be afraid to do it, take a tap class when it's offered, order that coffee now and then, get the fish, be okay to sit and cuddle, and understand that no matter how little sleep you are running on that you may be able to nap when you least expect it! 

Succor (suhk-er)

We knew the day was coming..... daycare. Not I had mixed emotions as the start of daycare meant many things... 1. I had a bit of personal freedom. 2. My baby wouldn't be with me each day - meaning I could miss things as they happen. 3. My baby is growing up! And that last one made me want to be sad!
So Matt and I worked out our arrangement... he would drop her off, I would pick her up and we'll start slow, to wean us all in. Just Tuesday and Thursdays. The first day didn't go like I had planned as I wasn't able to pick her up, I was in Fargo for a meeting. But when I saw her daily digest, I was happy to see that she was a happy baby.

The first day was also Matt's birthday. So that night, we went out for dinner at Los Lunas. I appreciate that Matt's come a long way with Mexican food as he hasn't always liked it and I could easily live on it. 

That weekend was also the Downtowners' Streetfair... I love anything where they have crafts and food trucks. Mmmmmm! This was the first that Matt's been. We strolled some of the booths. I had a corn dog, he had rice pudding and Chinese, and we split a peanut butter/honey/choc. chip waffle. Eleanor slept.

This weekend was a time for me to slow down and prepare as I've been working toward my big project at work. I am the lead on organizing and coordinating a conference and this year with baby and maternity leave, I've been a bit in the weeds. And the conference seemed to be coming up fast. In personal preparation, I took some time and made the downstairs curtains, couch cover, and pillows for the sectional that we just got. I had a little helper who might not have added to the project much. 

I have come to enjoy the conference because it's a labor of love. There's planning that happens all year long and it all culminates into a large event. This year we had a new venue which added to the planning as we haven't worked out the bugs yet. In the end, we broke a record for our Bismarck event with 475 people and the reviews were mostly positive (80% upbeat).

Since we knew hours and days were going to be long, we called in the Grandma to assist with baby. I knew most days I would have to be at the event center at 6:00am, and probably stay until 6:00pm.
Last June, ALR: Michele, I was wondering if you'd be available to come help us out with Len during my conference.
Michele: Yes.
ALR: I haven't told you the dates yet.
Michele: Oh, is it in February?
ALR: No, it's...
Michele: Then I can do it.
ALR: Well it's September 20-22.
Michele: Yep, I'll write that in my book
ALR: Do you want to talk to Randy first?

Michele was awesome to have available. It was nice to have her at home and they enjoy each other. I did laugh when I got home Thursday afternoon after everything was over and I found them both sleeping in the den. Immediately after this picture, Michele woke up because I scared the crap out of her.

Other big news for the week includes Eric. He moved home from Mississippi. He moved in with us and on Monday, after 1 hour of looking got a job finishing concrete. I know this move will be an adjustment for him. He's used to bach'ing and now he's living with a family including a 4 month old baby and all her "stuff."

Best meal: The entire family went to Bruno's one night.... It was a great meal despite I was exhausted.

ALR: Have you talked to your mom today? Do you know how it's going?
MJR: Yes, I also told her that Len could go to daycare if she had some running around to do.
ALR: Oh, yeah, right. Like Grandma is going to do that.

Commemoration (kuh-mem-uh-rey-shuh n)

Well, we were right. Someone decided to start rolling over right away. She did it at work over the lunch hour. She even gave herself quite the start! HA!

It took us a bit to get into the swing of things after getting back. We celebrated our anniversary in local style. Mom came over and babysat which gave us a little leeway to go out. We went to JL Beers, a place we can't really take her. Afterwards we went to Target... this really sums up how our life has changed.

In true tradition, we went to Bismarck Aero Center's Fly In. We enjoy supporting it and I have a feeling next year's will include an excited Dad and an excited Eleanor!

Her 4th month "birthday" was the same day as the fly in! I can't believe how much she's grown. From the beautiful little lump that would snore away beside me to this loud redhead who now grunts when she ends up on her belly from rolling over. We are happy it's only one directional rolling right now. this helps with sleeping at night.

Best meal: Burgers and cider/beer with my true love.

Letter to my love -
Our whole world has changed. I love it but it makes me want to cling to you more to ensure that we don't lose the things that make us, us. I know we can't pick up and go like we used to, we don't eat out like we did, we don't travel like we want but I love that you are there for me, for us, for her. I love that you are involved in our family like you are involved in our marriage... an active participant who cares about the outcome. Yes, I may get frustrated about washing bottles, and offering you a lesson but you were quick to learn and quick to pick it up. I look back on the wedding pictures and think of that special day as we've been to other weddings since then and I'd still do it all over again, no seriously, can we do it all over again?

Love Wifey.

PA: Prodigal (prod i guh l)

On Tuesday, we had to say good bye to go home. We left after breakfast. It's always hard to say good bye, especially when you don't know when you'll see this family again. 

We headed into Philly and Matt and I had a little surprised for Randy. When he was at Reading Terminal, he had a philly cheese and it wasn't great. We wanted to ensure that while in Philly, he had a good sandwich. With Pat's and Geno's across the street we had the ultimate steak off. We had a whiz and a provolone at each. Matt and I stayed true to our original choices when we first had them. We also have plans to sway Len to eventually make her choice too!

Len's flights homes were very good. She was an awesome traveler. We had quite the show while waiting to board though. Someone is on the verge of rolling over. Grandpa Randy wanted it so bad and was in high anticipation but she just couldn't get there. We figure it will happen any day now.

Best meal... Philly cheese steaks. Mmmm

MJR: Okay, we'll get two from each. Dad, Amanda will tell you how to order.

PA: Progenitor (proh jen i ter)

The day after the wedding was for resting, relaxing, a bit of tear down, and reminiscing. Everybody went down the hill after breakfast and it never ceases to amaze me how long it takes to put it all together and how it all can come down in a fraction of the time. It was fun to talk about the details of the wedding.

Afterward enjoying some lunch of wedding leftovers, we headed over to see Matt's uncle Gerard and aunt Linda. Was nice to visit with him and he enjoyed meeting Eleanor.

After visiting with them, we headed over to uncle Dave and aunt Liz's house and I met Matt's cousins - David, Nicole, and Paige. They had made an amazing meal for us. It was so nice to visit with them. I loved that they had basil in their window and an obsession with smoking meat - I saw many similarities between David and Matt. We could have sat and caught up all night. We were so distracted that we didn't even get a picture of them with Len. They picked out some cute outfits for her too. So sweet.

Best meal: David's brisket with mac and cheese and brownies with strawberries for dessert... all followed with a glass of Liz's homemade wine.

15 minutes after driving.
Michele: You are supposed to go left here.
MJR: I don't think so... I think we are supposed to go right.
Michele: No David said, left left right left right.
MJR looking at navigation on his phone.
Michele: It looks right.
MJR: No, no it's not.
Michele: David said left left right left right.
MJR: Mom, I'd already taken two lefts.
Michele silent for a bit: Oh. Yeah, then you needed to go right.
MJR in mocking tone: I know what's the quote on the blog this time.
As they circle the block and return back to the grocery store, MJR: Now we'll go right. 

PA: Nuptials (nuhp shuh l)

Wedding Day! With a light breakfast, we headed down the hill to get final preparations in place. Judy had so many details in her mind and it was amazing to see all the details come together. It was a beautiful day and I love a wedding that is true to the bride and groom. Not only did Judy look amazing but I loved the personal touches... like Judy's boots peeking out the back or Liam's vest matching Chris's, or the fact that they will also remember the tree that they exchanged their vows and the meadow in front of the creek where they had their first dance.

This was another first of Len's ... her first wedding. She was very good for the most part. It was also the first... and probably last time that she saw her Grandmother in cowboy boots! It was also her first dance... Matt and I managed to get one in.. well, one with a sleeping baby.

It was nice to dress up and enjoy the day. Len didn't have trouble finding people to fall in love with her... she had a few people whisk her away quite easily, including Becky who had made the blanket that we've used so much.

At about 7:00 - someone tuckered herself out and was falling asleep at the table. We hiked up the hill and put her to bed. I watched her and Liam fall asleep and put them off to bed. It did make me laugh to watch the fun on the dance floor as well a hear the DJ.  I also had to chuckle at watching the bride and maid of honor change their clothes and head back down the hill dance and fall from a canoe into a creek.

Best meal: Judy and Michele picked amazing options from the caterer including the meat balls, the pasta, and the chicken. There was so much food to enjoy!

Michele: Well, Judy, I'm glad you finally went and done it, made an honest man out of Chris.... 

Judy: Oh my gosh - I just realized that I didn't get a picture with you in my dress.
ALR: Well, you can put it on tomorrow and we'll retake pictures. 
Judy: Yes!
ALR: Judy, you will not! Ha! We will take one now all married and such.

PA: Gird (gurd)

We woke up in the middle of wedding planning, literally!
The bride and MOH went off to work some details and we packed Len up to show her her grandma's home and meet some of the relatives.Our first stop Great Grampa Dave's house. He was amazed at how she's grown since he's last seen her! He made sure to spend a bit of time talking and cuddling her in his chair. I also scooped out his garden and flowers that we is so proud of.

We left him to get his wedding outfit and we headed up the hill to Matt's Uncle Gerard and Aunt Linda's place. Gerard was out but we got to meet cousin Kate who did think Eleanor was pretty cute. Our biggest regret was not getting pics with them! Kate was packing to head off to teach in New York. She'll be living in Harlem and teaching in the Bronx - seems so adventurous compared to how Matt and I started our careers. It was unfortunate to hear about Matt's Aunt Linda who has some health concerns - glad that we could have Len meet her.

We went to the Silver Spoon diner for lunch. I had the gyro with pirogis. Matt had a burger. I know I got the better shake of the deal. After eating we headed back out to help with wedding details. Len got to spend a little couch time with Great Aunt Dileen. That's one thing about being a cute baby - everyone wants to hold you!

We were invited to partake in dinner after rehearsal. I helped them get loaded up to take everything down to the tent as Len had already fell asleep for the night. The evening ended with assisting the bride in finding songs for the DJ.

Best meal: I enjoyed salad and chili.

At Grampa Dave's,
GpaD: Oh, she's gotten so big.
EER squaks
GpaD: And louder!
EER laughs.

Around the computer
ALR: Judy, you have to end the night with a Native American Elvis impersonator singing "Can't Help Falling In Love With You"
Judy stares
MJR: It's true, all good marriages start that way.
Judy stares
Michele: I don't remember that happening at your wedding.
MJR: Well, I think I know why you don't remember that!

PA: Len sees Philly

 Len and the Liberty Bell

 Len and Independence Hall

 Len in Reading Terminal Market

 Len on the Big Bus Tour 

 Len and Ben Franklin's grave... she threw a penny on

 Len and Betsy Ross's grave site, outside her house.

 Len and the Constitution Center

 Len and the Chinese Friendship Arch in Philly's Chinatown

PA: Junket (juhn kit)

The next morning, we woke up... ready to soak up the last moments of Philly before heading out to Nicholson. While we slept comfortably in a king sized bed, we didn't have a crib for Len... So we improvised. She did pretty well with it actually.

After getting ready, we went down to the market for breakfast crepes (banana, pineapple, and honey) and I was determined to have a good pretzel. In the market, there was an Amish pretzel maker, you can't go wrong with the Amish cooking! I enjoyed one from Miller's Twist with honey mustard.

The last time I was in Philly, I went on the Big Bus tour of Philly with Jon and Kim. I had enjoyed it and Matt had wanted to participate so we the three of us headed to the top and went around the city. It was fun to see a bit more and learn even more.

After we ran the tour, we went back to the market for lunch. We split up and grabbed a few different items to try. We started with the Amish made rib sandwich - we had coleslaw and beans on the side. We followed that up with a cajun muffaletta sandwich and a cup of shrimp and crawfish etoufee. We finished the meal of with a cannoli to go.

It would have been great if we could have gotten out of town easily but do to traffic, we got behind schedule by 2 hours. We got to Judy's just as it was getting dusk.

Best meal: mmmmmm, that rib sandwich. If only I could have persuaded my Father-in-law to try it.

ALR and MJR waking up in hotel.
MJR: Good morning.
He leans over to kiss ALR
from drawer a angry growl is heard.
MJR: I'll come kiss you too!

On the way out of Philly, have been sitting at the same light for 20 minutes.
ALR: Oh, they talked about the detours and such on the bus tour.
MJR: What?
ALR: I think it's a concert.
MJR: Look up who's concert it is, who do we hate?
ALR begins to google.
ALR: Jay-z
MJR: Oh, good. I already hated him.

PA: Tzigane (tsi gahn)

I didn't take my first flight until I was almost 22 - and it was a direct flight to Vegas. Matthew had his when he was 6 months old from England back to America. Len beat us both. She's officially had her first flight... from BIS to PHL. 4:00AM, there we were going through TSA for our 5:00AM flight. I will admit, she handled the flight (and all the following flights) like a professional traveler. She napped a bit from the Minneapolis to Philly lag but took it all in when she was awake, even sat on Grandpa's lap a bit.

We got into Philly at a great time. Matt and I wanted to take Randy and Michele downtown to the Reading Terminal Market - one of our favorite spots in Philly. There is so much to eat and see! I enjoyed Mediterranean Chicken with hummas, rice, and salad. Matt and Michele had Chinese. Randy had a disappointing cheesesteak, It was fun to show them the fish displays and the pizza place and the cannolis. I stated I HAD (no questions, no matter the line's length) to have a Beiler's donut. I've been dreaming of those donuts on a regular basis for a year. I did have a Key Lime and Mocha but my favorite is the Peanut Butter. mmmmmmmmmmmmm. I would go back to Philly just for that donut. Ironically the stand also sells pickles, making my husband happy as well. While Michele was cheese shopping, Matt and I found smoothies - mine was a lemonana (mint lemonade with rosewater) and Matt's was mango-guava-papaya.


After we left the market, we went to check out the Liberty Bell. We also took in the outside of Independence Hall. With that, Michele and Randy headed to Nicholson and Matt, Len, and I strolled around Philly. This free day before heading up to see family was to celebrate our 3 year anniversary.

Matt rediscovered OCP - where he got an Italian sandwich. We also took in Betsy Ross's garden and grave site. We also strolled by Constitution Hall, Dilworth Park, and China Town before going back to the Market for an oyster plate.

I got a craving for a Philly soft pretzel and after some online research thought I found a spot close by. However, after finding it, I realized I got had. The pretzels at the Philly Pretzel Factory are not soft or flavorful or wonderful. They are cheap though. Ugh.

We finished the night with supper at a local place, the Oyster House. This was a cute place with great decor - all over the walls there were decorative oyster plates. On the menu they had raw clams - something Matt and I hadn't had - so we tried them. A half dozen (cherrystone and long necks) in total. And it's something that I can say that I've tried but don't know if I'll order again.We also had a peach gazpacho and grilled octopus. It was nice. Even if we had a tired little distract... she passed out on the way home. Philly was just too much for her.

Best meal: Mediterranean Chicken with smooth hummus, salad, rice, and the follow up of the lemonana... oh wait, maybe the donut was the best meal. mmmmmm.

ALR: Where do you want to take your parents first?
MJR: To show them the fish displays.
ALR: You know not everyone thinks they are beautiful like we do.
MJR with actual surprise on his face: What?

After the first pass with all 5 of us.
ALR: I think we need a map.
Randy: And a seat.
Michele: I could eat here everyday.
MJR like a little kid: I know, right!
Randy: But you'd need a seat.